aShmaaaaaa! Home soooooooon

So, I've been at Judy's place for about two weeks now and I honestly really feel blessed to have had my experience here.  They're quite the family!  And really something very special.aShmaaa!  It's a word only in their family that's just like commentary for 'cute!' the Cree often say "anjaba" and in Waskaganish, I think it is, they say "Anjabwe!"

So I have less than two more weeks.  I'll be really sad to leave this community because I may or may not come back (I really don't know)  But I've never been more excited to go home.

Mom, I miss her soooo much!  I just want to hug her and apologize again and again for how hard I've always been on her.  I feel like I've changed a lot, and that my life isn't just valuable for me, but for family too.  I still think of myself to be free to go where I please, but now, I see that love is what will always give me home and comfort.
And my SamSam- I miss him sooooo much! My puppies, my dad, my brother, sister, my friends, a place I can really call "home."  I've spent a year now, constantly adapting and readapting and believe me, I've grown up a lot, but I'm so ready to be with my family again. 

The only thing I'm feeling a little apprehensive about is my move to Winnipeg.  I'm afraid I might have difficulty finding a job, that I'll feel alone in a big town (I have friends there though, and I'll be living with Sam, which makes the WORLD of a difference, of course.)  The other thing is, I still feel an attachment to Guelph, to tell the truth. I follow a few blogs about Guelph and I get stuff on facebook telling when the poetry slams are.  But once again, I'm going to have to start somewhere anew, and I'm feeling a little tired of that.  I'm sure I'll feel better when I see my family at the farm though.  It's just the city...  It's artistic, cultural and there's a lot going on, but it's a big city and right now, I'm finding that somewhat intimidating.  I'm giving myself time before I go to school though.  And I think it's for the better.  Love is what will take me from here to there in the end, but whether or not I feel comfortable makes a big difference and I've never lived in a big city for any amount of time so I'm a wee unsure.

I can't wait though, to see Sam, to be home, to be with my family- chaos and all.